Counseling

Tomorrow is another marriage counseling session.  I am so sick of dealing with all of this.  I cannot wait until I feel like myself again.  I cannot wait until I can go through one single day not on the verge of an emotional breakdown. Today I lost it.  I cried, sobbed, over nothing. Just a […]

Every day I wait for the pain to go away.  I wonder if it ever will.  I haven’t even passed my year and my future looks bleak. Even when I have good days, my mind is still bad.  I am foggy, slow, forgetful, fearful, worrisome, scared.  I have never been a person who was scared.  […]

Thankful for what?

Thanksgiving is a hard time.  It is definitely going to be a day that “triggers” me for a long time.  For a few reasons.  One is that last year, for the first time in probably 10+ years, I cooked our meal at home. In the past, I had been out of town with family while […]

It’s been a while

It’s been a long time since I have written.  Life has been busy, and like the dutiful wife I am, I have been taking care of it.  I try to go through each day and act like this strong, independent woman that, at the moment, I am pretending to be. I am not the person […]

Am I worth it?

I want to write more often than I do, but I feel like a whiner, with the same subject all the time.  This has consumed my life.  It sucks.  I just want to feel better.  Things feel like they are falling back into the same routine as before.  I don’t really feel like my husband […]

WTF??

I am away.  And previously, that was the time that my husband would spend with his AP. (Still haven’t settled on a title for her)  When I went out of town for a funeral, a wedding, a holiday, and a visit or two to my parents house.  Honestly, the funeral is the worst for me.  […]